I love Linux, but I can't quit Windows
I've been distro-hopping for probably twenty years. Fedora, OpenSUSE, Ubuntu, Arch, and most recently Fedora with KDE Plasma. Every time I install Linux I feel a small swell of optimism, like this time it'll stick. However, every time I go back to Windows I feel relieved that I can use my computer properly again.
Linux never sticks with me.
I idolise Linux and the people who use it. High performing developers I've admired most use Linux. They seem to have this fluency with their machines that I've always found aspirational. I subconsciously tell myself 'If I just used Linux, I could be like them!'. I felt the same about Vim. If I just learned Vim properly, I could write code better and faster. Switching to Linux or Vim won't make me better. I think it's just me procrastinating from the real issue, whatever that is.
My Linux Desktop Experience
I've used Linux at least every year for two decades. Back in the day, I dealt with wifi issues, trackpad issues, sound issues, screen tearing, sleep issues.
This time, two things broke.
First, websites started taking ten to twenty seconds to load. Not DNS, not network. Firefox's DevTools just said waiting for server. I couldn't diagnose it. Maybe it was Linux, maybe it wasn't, but I didn't trust Linux enough to rule it out. That distrust itself is a problem.
Second, the update utility got stuck. Just frozen. Couldn't open it. I hadn't tweaked anything, hadn't installed anything unusual, hadn't deviated from the vanilla setup. Day seven of a fresh Fedora install and the update tool was bricked.
I can't tolerate vanilla installs going bad. If I tweak something and it breaks, that's fair. That's on me. But if I use a vanilla install, with the default tools, in the default configuration, and it still breaks, then I feel like I can't trust it.
A year or two before this, I tried OpenSUSE full-time. A routine update bricked my system on day seven. I went to IRC, Reddit, the forums. The community were genuinely helpful and gave interesting, considered responses. I still couldn't fix it. The time I lost to that was completely disproportionate to any problem I've ever had on Windows.
Why Windows
Windows friction is predictable. The setup screens asking me to sign up to Microsoft 365. The Start menu occasionally surfacing Bing results when I'm searching for an app. The notifications suggesting I try Edge. These things are annoying, but they're known. I can dismiss them, turn them off, and move on. Barely 10 seconds is lost.
Linux friction is unpredictable. The update tool freezing for no reason. System-wide slowdown I can't diagnose. Notifications telling me too many programs are listening for file changes and asking me to decide whether to increase the limit (a decision I don't understand why I'm being asked to make). The friction isn't necessarily higher in total, but the unexpected issues are more likely to cost me an entire afternoon rather than a few seconds.
With that said, Microsoft does kinda suck and has a habit of messing with things.
The default state of a fresh Windows install is unpleasant. News in the taskbar, weather widget, MSN content bleeding in everywhere (MSN represents the worst parts of the internet). It takes maybe ten minutes to clean up, but you're cleaning it up every reinstall. VS Code used to a pure code/text editor. Now it's an AI thingy. Notepad, a long standing and trustworthy app, was redesigned and had AI added to it. That felt like sacred ground that was encroached upon. That felt like a betrayal of trust.
I don't trust Microsoft not to crapify more things, but Windows still works better for me. I need my machine to work. I can't spend an afternoon tweaking my computer anymore. Maybe when I was in my teens or early 20's when I had nothing but time, but not now.
Maybe I'll try Linux again next year. I probably will. I always do.